Using And Abusing Personal Power

Every interaction, no matter how great or small, is an exchange of power. We feed positively or negatively off one another. We can lift one another up or take them down with us.

Every single thing we do has a motive, good or bad, behind it. We have a reason behind every action we take whether it is in our own self interest or not. Sometimes doing good for others is still a selfish motive; yet it is not harmful as opposed to intentionally hurting those around us.

Performing from a place of love sets good things in motion. When our intentions are based in love, everyone’s best interest is at the heart of the matter. There is no room for jealousy, greed, fear, or hatred in the realm of love.

Most people can be categorized into givers or takers. Manipulators give in order to take. They act out of their own insecurities and fears. Many of us do things for others all the time; we might do it simply because they need our assistance. We might even get personal satisfaction knowing we are needed. There are times we do things for material gain.  Other times we do things for personal empowerment such as being able to manipulate or control their actions by “guilting’ them that they now owe us something.

When we make choices at the detriment of another’s emotional or physical well-being we’ve crossed the line. When we gain materially or emotionally at another’s loss we’ve not only robbed them but ourselves as well. The gain is short lived because anyone who has a healthy sense of right and wrong will eventually come to know the extent of what has been done. Who does not feel guilty in the long run when they realize the pain they’ve caused to others?

When we do things out of love without motive, there’s no need to explain our actions. When we remind people how much we do for others, possibly our own conscience is trying to awaken us to the reality of our intentions. When we bring attention to the things we do, it’s time to examine our own motives. Those who use  power to control another’s life or influence them to side with them on the matter at hand are acting out of fear. It takes courage to remain quiet and let the situation play itself out. Good deeds need no explanation as they speak for themselves.

When we help others do we establish that something must be done in return for our favor? When we serve unselfishly and the time comes we need assistance, faith guarantees us love and compassion will be returned to us.

None of us need allow another to control us. They have nothing of internal value we need in this life. All we need rests within us. We only need look inside for guidance. We each have a lifetime supply of love. With love as our motive we will always win.

Living in the Gap

March 14, 2012 – Rocking a baby

The baby snuggled into my squashy flesh. He wiggled his tiny arms and legs until they were cushioned into my folds. He closed his eyes and drifted off as I rubbed the wisps upon his head and patted his bottom. Unlike my skin, his is as smooth as river rock and soft as twilight. His warm breath soaked into the crook of my neck as he nuzzled his face against my shoulder. Heartbeat to heartbeat, we rocked…the cadence of life was all that existed in the moment.

23 thoughts on “Using And Abusing Personal Power

  1. I had some whack jobs for principals over the years. They felt they were not doing their job if everyone was not stressed out, exhausted, job threatened and generally unhappy. Kids AND teachers.

    • I think all school districts have a few of those. It is sad when people use emotional or physical means to overpower others or even to make themselves feel better. It happens all the time in all realms of life, but it doesn’t make it right.

  2. Excellent post, Suzi!

    And I totally agree with you on all points.

    “When we remind people how much we do for others, possibly our own conscience is trying to awaken us to the reality of our intentions. When we bring attention to the things we do, it’s time to examine our own motives.”

    Couldn’t have said that any better.

    “Good deeds need no explanation as they speak for themselves.

    Amen!

    Have an awesome Wednesday, my friend!

    X

    P.S. Adored your Living in the Gap. TOTALLY made me smile. For me, there is nothing more beautiful than holding a baby.

  3. Whenever someone calls attention to their “good deeds” . . . it makes me wonder about their motivation for acting.

    To do good? Or to be viewed by others as good? 😉

  4. Your Living in the Gap was precious! Reminded me of how often I rocked my son to sleep when he was little. So fitting as a conclusion to your post today!

  5. Ummm…I can smell that wee baby…

    Yes, SuziCate, somehow there’s been a slip off the tracks about looking after ourselves. When we neglect ourselves (thinking we must put everyone and everything else first), how can we possibly be healthy, strong and available for those who truly need us.

    Too many folk think they must do, do, do for others first…they are so busy enabling others instead of giving those people space needed for them to learn their responsibilities and consequences.

    Even Mother Theresa taught that if we are not able to give from the heart, it is better to not give. I was shocked when I first saw that – however, I was not mature enough to see the wisdom of her statement.

    Who am I kidding when I help someone with a begrudging heart because I’m tired or sick or wishing I were somewhere else?

    • I feel giving must be done from the heart or its full measure is not felt by the giver or the receiver. When it’s heartfelt and received it’s wonderful for both parties…everyone wins.

  6. I believe “givers gain.” And we gain the most when we give genuinely and not expect anything in return. I also try and believe that no one can ride your back unless it’s bent.

    your Gap entry made me realize how much I would love to have another grandbaby!

  7. I found the below paragraph very helpful, thanks!

    “When we do things out of love without motive, there’s no need to explain our actions. When we remind people how much we do for others, possibly our own conscience is trying to awaken us to the reality of our intentions. When we bring attention to the things we do, it’s time to examine our own motives. Those who use power to control another’s life or influence them to side with them on the matter at hand are acting out of fear. It takes courage to remain quiet and let the situation play itself out. Good deeds need no explanation as they speak for themselves.”

  8. I agree. I always tell hubby “Don’t ever rejoice over someone else’s misfortune”. I think that’s just cruel and is also tempting the universe to bring something worse on you!

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