Dreams, Vision Boards, and Not Taking It Personally

Life overflows with synchronicity. We often overlook these coincidences because we are not in tune with our surroundings. Since I’ve been taking the time to be attentive this year, I’ve had several things speak to me…actually feels a bit like they’re shouting, but the words are still muffled…

Over the past three weeks I’ve read four books by four different authors, and in each of them they have stated not to take things personally. I am sensitive and always think things are about me. Seriously, how self-absorbed am I? I’m trying to look at the bigger picture. I am seeing how much of what I think is about me is really about someone else’s mood or motive. I’m also realizing I am not a key player in these scenarios as I’ve worked myself up to be. I’m learning to let go, and it sure feels good.

Lately I have seen or heard about vision boards. It made me think of this book I started reading once that was saying about how you can manifest your desires by writing them down. At first I thought it was reasonable as I do like to write, but the more I thought about it, I thought it would be a selfish thing for me to do. Anyway, now I see vision boards popping up in movies, magazines, and on blogs. It keeps tugging at me, and I keep shrugging it off. I can’t seem to shake it. I’m getting better about listening, so today I did my version of one. This reminded me of how much I’ve always loved making collages. For some strange reason, I felt relief after I did it…however, I make no promises as to whether I will ever show it to anyone or not.

I dream vividly, but few of the dreams stick with me long after I wake up. I’ve had three fairly recent dreams that have kept me thinking. I feel like they each have hidden meanings which have made me rethink some of my misconceptions about myself. I’m going to recap them here for you…feel free to analyze them for me.

Dream 1:

Dirt Man and I were at some type of a reunion, like a gathering of high school friends, maybe. We were walking around and talking which is typical of get togethers. There were tables everywhere, some with food and others where people had placed their belongings. There were several rows of folding chairs like that of an assembly hall. I placed my purse in one of the seats and we moved on to talk to people. When we came back my purse was missing. I became frantic and asked others to help me find it. I told them it was a simple white purse. People kept coming up to me with various white purses and asking if it was mine and I’d say no and describe mine as somehow being different like smaller or a clutch. They stopped bringing me shoulder bags and started arriving with small white smooth clutch purses. Then I mentioned mine was puckered near the top at the zipper. Someone thrust one at me and it looked like mine so I peered inside and confirmed by the contents it was mine. There were two items in it I had been afraid of losing, but I can’t remember what either was.

Dream 2:

I was at a salon getting my hair cut. I told the stylist I only wanted it lightly trimmed. I watched her work through the mirror. Huge hunks of my hair were flying everywhere. I was so frantic I couldn’t breathe. The stylist kept telling me how much I was going to love it. I was completely unable to respond. When she finished the longest bit was one side of the length which almost hit the top of my shoulder and the other side was about four inches shorter with the middle center part buzzed and about an inch circumference buzzed so that the waves on the long side stuck out and flowed and the short side just sort of hung. I wanted to die. She removed the cape and never asked if I liked it. I couldn’t speak. She walked away leaving me in the chair. Then she stomped back toward me and said “that bitch (referring to the receptionist) says I can’t get my tip from her.” I told her it was ok I’d bring it to her. Seriously, I was still going to tip someone who’d not only did not listen to me but totally destroyed my hair? I walked in a daze wandering around the salon looking for Dirt Man. He looked at me with his finger on his chin and asked if I really liked it? I told him no but I just didn’t know what to do. He told me to find the manager. I continued wandering around the salon in a daze until I ran upon the manager (someone from my real life hairdressing days), and I woke up before I spoke.

Dream 3:

I was apparently a student who just received a graded writing assignment. It was something I had worked long and hard on and had counted on getting a good grade. The paper was marked “E/65pts” which was in fact a failing grade; however there wasn’t a single grammatical mark on the paper. I knew the work was original and thought provoking. I was stunned. Where had I gone wrong? I kept staring at the grade over and over. There was cover page with a list for the teacher to check for points counted off, yet all of the infractions remained unchecked. I kept scanning the paper and finally noticed the very last line had an ever faint tiny line on it and it was worth a whopping 35 points stating FAILURE TO INCLUDE THIS CHECK SHEET WITH YOUR REPORT WILL RESULT IN A THIRY-FIVE POINT LOSS.

I often think of someone and the phone rings and they’re on the other end. I imagine we all are products of happenstance at one time or another.  There has been much occurring in my life and around me; however, for some reason these dreams and coincidences have provoked intense reflection within me.

Living in the Gap

February 1, 2012 – hot bath

As I took a simple bath for granted, I was reminded it is a luxury to some, and if put in perspective is generally a pleasure for most. The hot water rushed and tumbled from the faucet, quickly inching its way up the aqua tub until it became a blue pond. The heat invited my aching bones. As I submerged into the searing wetness, the vapor rolled from my skin. All was quiet except for my breathing. With each inhale and exhale the water waved around my legs. Then the drip, drip, drip of the beads dribbling through the pipes and plunging into the pool of water began. Creak. Crack. Pop. The door? The wall? The vent? The pipes? Who knows the origins of creaks in old houses? Still the warmth of the water enveloped me, and I eased into solitude. As I exited the tub the steam rose from my body and met the air and mingled, settling as fog on the mirror. How often our heads and hearts rise to meet one another in a haze until they balance…

27 thoughts on “Dreams, Vision Boards, and Not Taking It Personally

  1. “Life overflows with synchronicity. We often overlook these coincidences because we are not in tune with our surroundings. Since I’ve been taking the time to be attentive this year, I’ve had several things speak to me…actually feels a bit like they’re shouting, but the words are still muffled…”

    Love that, Suzi. I do believe in synchronicity and coincidences, and do find myself overlooking them at times because my mind gets cluttered with the details of what I might be trying to figure out; completely unaware of what’s directly in front of me at the time – which is usually a sign/direction.

    I once took a class in dream interpretation and discovered that the dreamers’ subconscious uses specific symbols to convey the meaning of a dream, therefore, we are really the only ones who can interpret them. If you stand back and look (or actually, FEEL) the overall emotions you felt while dreaming the dream, that should give you a clearer understanding of what the dream meant. Almost like a theme – the overall picture – what your subconscious is trying to tell you.

    Gosh, does that make any sense?

    Great post, my friend!

    Happy Wednesday……X

    • Symbolically it might mean something totally different than I think…just had a gut feeling about each one…will have to look up those symbols. Another commenter mentioned things I had never even thought of…

  2. Repeat after me: “What you think of me is none of my business.”

    Aah . . . that’s better!

    Glad you created your version of a vision board. I’m loving mine . . . it’s opened me up to possibilities.

    • I love that line, “What you think of me is none of my business.” Yes! Thanks for the reminder.

      I need you gals to hold my hand and lead me through making a vision board. I feel like such a klutz even contemplating the idea. I see these elegant, gorgeous ones on the web … and the puny efforts I’ve made look like a preschool crayon drawing. Inner critic, begone!

  3. I love reading dreams and you share pungent, juicy ones. My heart pounds along with yours just thinking of them. Surely you’ll decode their message.

    How do you balance the advice to not take things personally (“let go of ego”), with the opposite perspective that we dream our world into being, therefore everything is about “me”?

    Whether messages are embedded in the world by purposeful design, or I simply find them there according to my needs, I do find them, and they are soothing and useful. I think we each need to find our own way with this, just as we find our balance with that big question above.

    • I have decoded them which I will post on one of these other messages…basically life lessons I need to learn.
      Putting it that way does seem opposite. By not taking things personally (in the books and how I”m looking at it) is by not thinking what other people do or say have anything to do with me, as it has everything to do with them. We far too often put ourselves in the center of other people’s lives…however on our vision boards we are the star; now, that is balance!
      Yes, I think we each decode them the way we are meant to.

  4. Oh, my, how can you feel rested when your dreams have been so hectic and disturbing? I suspect somebody who interprets dreams could have a field day with these three! Take a deep breath, relax, and let go — perhaps in another nice, warm bath?!

  5. Hi, It sounds like the purse one is a fear of financial insecurity. The hair one is a fear of getting older. Would you believe this, Suzicate. I was feeling a bit out of focus at work today, I decided that tonight, I would make a collage of my dreams and wishes. A collage to focus on, things and places I want in my life. How strange, sycronicity!!

    • Susan, I never looked at them symbolically….I’d have to depend on google for that. However, they spoke to me immediately (though my interpretations might be way off base).
      The first one seemed to be an affirmation that it’s ok to be like everyone else, and even so we are each unique…therefore I do have my own gifts to offer. The second one I felt was telling me that I need to learn to speak up for myself which has been a lifelong problem though I’ve gotten much better. And the third one I think is telling me that I must follow protocol (no skipping steps) if I want to reach my desired dreams…I am famous for not following written instructions when assembling things.
      Yes, that is synchronicity… As silly as my collage looks (and as selfish as it somehow feels), I still feel good about it as it sort of lays out what I really do want. Interestingly, it’s not much in material things; maybe that’s why Crayola markers and I had some fun! I’m a person who tends to like words!

  6. Your dreams remind me a lot of mine. Always struggling through one thing or another. It seems to me I am working something out. I haven’t had as many dreams that I remember lately though. Maybe I’m good? HA!

    I like how you know the second was about speaking up for yourself. I have that same problem.

  7. It’s been years since I could remember any of my dreams. When I was in my early twenties, I had dreams that I was at work (waitressing) and I was really behind. I neglected to put orders in, I forgot where menu items were on the computer, co-workers were getting frustrated with me and customers started yelling at me. I felt overwhelmed with work and college and the anxiety crept into my dreams (nightmares!)

    It sounds like you might have the causes figured out, so maybe the dreams will stop for a while. I liked the beauty salon one. I think you nailed the meaning behind that one. Go ahead, say what’s on your mind 🙂

  8. With the women I mentor, there’s an end to the quote that Nancy gave: “…what matters is what I think of you.”

    So often we laugh at ourselves because we repeatedly find we have unrealistic expectations of others. We want them to do what we’d do and be the way we are!

  9. One of the four agreements is not to take things personally. I do not think this is easy, but it is very freeing. If you just take things as people say them, it is much less stressful. If people really have “issue” with you and they are people you care about and they care about you, they will talk to you about it directly. If they don’t then don’t worry about it and don’t take what they say personally. This to me is a relative of listening with love. If you listen with love (one aspect it) people are talking to you with love and again, if they have issue with you they will address it directly.

    It is funny how we get messages from the universe/God/the world/whatever. Where it keeps popping up. Often times I feel as if there is a message, but I don’t think that I always know what it is.

    With your dreams, I am going to take the first one literally – don’t leave your purse about unattended. Really. I have a “thing” about that. Now that I am typing, it could be about leaving things unattended? Hmmmm?

    The second one, I thought of the same thing as you while I was reading it. Sounds as if the lesson could be not only to speak up for yourself, but to do it BEFORE the “damage” is done. Don’t let things keep going until you are left with an ugly haircut! If you are being more attentive (as you have stated), maybe you are actually seeing things in the making that are having you want to speak up about . . . and maybe speaking now instead of later is better. Because hair grows back, but maybe the situations you are seeing might not be as easily “fixed”.

    The third one made me think of a story about that I’ve heard where for a final in college the professor had at the top, “Write your name in the left hand corner and turn the paper in.” And those that actually read the instructions passed. So could be kind of like you are saying. Following protocol. Reading directions.

    Also, I always understood a vision board to be like goal setting, but instead of writing up a business plan or a list of goals you do it on a board. So I wouldn’t consider that selfish. I think it is a great idea.

    I rarely take a shower without thanking God for the fabulous luxury! Hot water. Anytime I want. I am blessed!

    • The Four Agreements is the first place I read it and then three more times…figured it must be speaking to me!
      I don’t always get the message either even though I have a strong feeling there is one in there somewhere.
      Oh Terre, you are so sweet. I just love that you thank God for your shower!

      • Oh SC, I thank God often during the day because I know I have a lot of things that others don’t have. Clean, hot water is one our biggest blessing and as I take a shower or do the dishes (yes, I am thankful I get to wash dishes!) I say thanks because I LOVE clean, hot water so much!

  10. It’s funny that I used to always think that always thinking people were talking about me was my insecurities when I guess actually it was being narcissitic! I know I spelled that wrong. Anyway, I guess we sometimes think more of ourselves that others do! And I love the thought that what others think of us is none of our business!

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