On Leaving A Legacy

Each weekend, I usually spend time with a dearly beloved elderly friend. She usually tells me lots of stories and we share much laughter over tea and biscotti. Lately, she has been feeding me the important stories of her life, not just the many exciting adventures throughout her many years but the truths of her life.

This has left me reflecting on what kind of a legacy I will be leaving behind. I used to think that it would be my writings throughout the years that I’ve packed and stored. (You know the ones that no one ever reads until someone dies!) It was three boxes. I decided a few years ago that I really didn’t want people freaking out reading some of the morbid things I wrote during a state of depression. I threw all of those out and lessened my load down to two boxes. Last year I started going through some of them to find that I had a second copy of said morbid works. This time I kept them because I realize that they tell a story of who I was at the time. If I am going to leave a piece of me behind, it may as well be a legacy of truth.

As I thought about how much my writing tells who I am, I came to the conclusion that my writing does not define me. I am so much more than words on a piece of paper. Will I be defined by the stitches of love in the quilts I’ve designed or will I reside in the jewelry or other crafts I’ve created? What will be my mark on the world? I’m hoping that I will live on in the hearts of those I’ve touched. Will my memory reside in a warm embrace I have exchanged or in words of advice I’ve given? Will I be remembered for the love and time given to the care of small children? Or duties carries out in other jobs I’ve held? Will my friendship stand out for some? Will my life be described as a wife and mother and nothing in between? I suppose I will never know those answers.

As much as I have called my sensitivity a curse in my life, it has also been a catalyst. Without this heightened state of being, I would never have lived life to the fullest. Internally, that is. There are many things I have not accomplished or even attempted, however, I have felt all of my experiences to the core of my being. And my friends, that is truly living. I suppose by some standards that would make me an introvert, yes those people that the wild and crazy ones feel sorry for. Don’t feel sorry for me that I haven’t traveled to far away lands, for I have traveled to them in my heart which is exactly my preference. I want to be a person without regrets. I want to be remembered as the person who cried with others and helped them find the courage within themselves to get back up. I want to be remembered as the person who pointed out the extraordinary qualities of what they called their ordinary lives. I want the people in my life to remember how they felt when they were with me. I want to be the smiles on their  faces when they think of me. I want to be the memory of love, laughter, and life in their hearts.

****The hard drive on my laptop is fried! I know horrible…out of the ashes the hope is that it is under warranty. I have had it a little over a year and only thought I had a one year warranty, but fortunately it looks like I have a two year warranty. Bad news is that not every thing is retrievable. Totally sucks, but such it is. Anyway, I will have to skip around from desk top to desk top here at home, so I won’t be as quick at reading or commenting on your blogs for at least probably three days. Another thing is that my favorites are gone…so unless I was smart enough to put you on my blog roll or you’ve left me a comment in the past, it may be quite a while before I find your blog again. Please leave me a comment and I will book mark you as soon as my baby is well again!

34 thoughts on “On Leaving A Legacy

  1. SuziCate you offer up some very thought provoking posts! You have an amazing amount of writing under your belt and I feel there must be a book or two to reveal from all of it.

    As for being remembered, I believe the real remembering of people lies within the hearts of those who live on after us. Those we have loved and who loved us in return, who know us and remember simply with love.

  2. In my memory, you will be the person who most encouraged me to continue blogging; the person who unfailingly had a comment to make on one of my posts. My blogging role model, if you will. To those who are fortunate enough to know you in person, I’m sure you’ll be remembered as much more.

    External hard drives and Sync Toy (free software to create duplicate folders on your external hard drive) – they can save a lot of heartbreak.

    • Yeah, we have an external…dummy me just never backup! Looks like I’ve lost all my music and a lot of pictures, but think my documents are saved…that is most important…and yes, a big lesson learned. I’m mostly inconvenienced by ahving to sit at one of the desks in the house. Thank you, Carol for your very kind comment on this post. I am so glad you are continuing to blog because it’s one of my favorite places to visit.

  3. Leaving A Legacy a lot of us think about this but no matter what you think you will be remembered for think about this one, life is always changing so by the time your time comes what will you be doing and will that overshadow what you have done in the past.

    Do your best in whatever you do and enjoy what you do without worries of what may happen and your Legacy will form in the memories you leave with those who love you.

    Hope you get your computer back up and running soon.

  4. I just wanted to come by and wish you a very happy time blogging. I will be on vacation. I will do my very best to get to a computer.I may have to leave a quick comment, but you will know I have been by. I will also be checking my blog for comments left. So, if you leave a comment….REMEMBER…Make me SMILE. Thanks to you all.

  5. This made me cry. (Not the part about your hard drive, though that is a reasonable thing to cry about…lol) But the post. A good cry. Thanks, Suzicate.

  6. I think being sensitive means being able to feel emotions to the fullest; the good ones and the bad ones… And that’s always a good thing! 🙂
    A mark on the hearts of the ones you’ve touched and stories you wrote over the years are the best legacy to leave behind!

  7. I like to befriend old or older folks too. Their stories are their legacies.

    SuziCate, when your computer is well and you get the chance, please visit me at Terima Kasih. I have a thank you note for you. It is rather overdue:)

  8. that was horrible. i hope maximum data will be recovered.
    wish you the very best. been there seen that but it was my sheer good fortune that my priceless data by saved by an angel without wings.
    lots of love.

  9. On the blog world, you are leaving a legacy with your heartfelt, eloquent writing. It’s a bright spot in my days to visit you.

    I am sorry to hear of your sick little laptop.

  10. The biggest legacy you will leave is the love any who have been in your presence feels.

    Sorry about your laptop but it is a timely reminder for me to backup my documents. Hope it’s all better soon.

  11. I’d send you my geek if I could.
    I know what you mean about legacies. I wonder if my words will be my legacy or my daughter’s memories of me. Whatever it is, I just hope it’s a good one.

  12. You scared me for a minute. I thought your little old lady friend had passed, which made me sad, because we just met her! Glad that’s not the case. Yes, I wonder about what legacy I might leave for those around me, and how they will remember me, but I think it’s truly different for every person in your life. Keep up the writing. You’re great at it. 🙂

    And a total bummer on the laptop.

  13. I haven’t thought much at all about my legacy. I suppose I feel similarly to you. I want to bring a smile to faces – even a laugh. I want to be remembered for being sensitive, for showing people I loved them. As for my writing? I think it is too early to say all these words may say about me.

    P.S. Sucks about your computer!

  14. I LOVE how you said this, SC…

    ” Without this heightened state of being, I would never have lived life to the fullest. Internally, that is. ”

    I can so identify with your words – I too am sensitive. I think most creative and artist people are, because we have to allow everything around us to touch us deeply in order to express it through our words, art, etc. It’s like a double edge sword. However, I wouldn’t change it for anything.

    And as far as your legacy?

    I know we’ve only known each other for a short time, but I’ve always been able to FEEL your amazing spirit through your words.

    That’s your legacy.

    Beautiful post, dear lady….X

    P.S. sorry to hear about your laptop.

  15. I am burning pics as we speak. I run a backup automatically every week. Hope your computer hijinks are settled soon and not too painfully. As far as sensitivity goes (my soul cancer sister), there needs to be people like you around. You will be remembered and are remembered every day. We do not always even know the people that we touch. Keep being you. Hugs

  16. I am so sorry about your computer sweetie. I know what it is like to lose things. Once I lost my whole book and had to rewrite it. It took me 2 years to write the book and 2 years to rewrite it.

    I love your story, and only you could tell it so well. You my dear is going to leave much more than you realize behind, because you have not only touch the lives of your family members, but the lives of everyone that you have met. I know you have touched my life in the short time that I have known you. Don’t throw any of your writings out, because like you said they tell how you were feeling at the time.

  17. I’ve been musing over similar thoughts, as well, Suzi. It was nice to read this post. I think all we can do is live and love. By just being ourselves we are sure to leave legacies behind and be remembered. Good for you for keeping those darker writings from a past time. It’s like a sort of acceptance of it.

    Hope your computer is back up and running perfectly well soon!

  18. ttp://jingleyanqiu.wordpress.com/2010/06/04/thursday-poets-rally-week-21-the-perfect-poet-award/

    week 21 the perfect poet award reminder,
    we require a minimum visits to 18 poets to be done for Rally from week 22 to week 42.
    Thank you in advance!

  19. Suzicate, your writing is extraordinary. I’m going to ask Alex if he can do something with your laptop to save your stuff. (He’s in Augusta right now till Friday.) He’s got some time in the afternoons and if you could take it to him, I am sure he would want to help. (He’s working midnights till 10 AM or something like that so I won’t hear from him until later today.) One thing he has banged into me over and over is back up your stuff. We all need to, (and none of us does it). Still, he might be able to recover your material and put all of it on a disk so you have them.

  20. Sorry to hear about the technical difficulties! I do hope they salvage as much as they can.

    As for those journals — what a step into the past reading those must be. I once reread some old entries from a few years ago and was surprised at how much I’d written down that had thoroughly vanished from memory in the present.

  21. Speaking of computer troubles, the comment I wrote just disappeared into the ether. Whoops!

    I just wanted to say that I think it’s great that you decided to hold onto your writing from your darker days. As you said, it’s a piece of who you are and a part of your legacy along with your strength and humor.

    Good luck with your computer woes!

  22. Beautiful sentiments. Once we can learn to use our sensitivity as a tool instead of trying to overcome it, things start to brighten. It’s a dangerous slope to let anything define you, whether it’s something you excel at or something that’s a weakess for you. I know your skilled, sensitive writing will last through centuries! It’s impacted so many of us.

  23. I’ve had the same thoughts, too, and have often wondered what my legacy will be. And I am also a very sensitive person, so I know exactly what you mean about going places in your heart. I wish more people would understand that’s how sensitive/creative/imaginative people are… we don’t need to actually do something to know what it feels like. Good luck with your computer problems!!

  24. It’s so important to take time to reflect on things like this. I think the world would be a better place if more people would stop to ponder the inner workings of their minds/lives.

    Sorry about the hard drive problem, that does suck!

  25. Hi Suzi! This is a great post. It makes me think of my mamaw. Her legacy was her love, gentleness, kindless, love of the Lord, her quilts and her humor.

    In fact, I just used a quilt on my retreat she made me as a little girl. Everytime I use it, I sleep like a baby.

    When she passed away, we found a letter in her Bible addressed to the entire family on how she saw her life and ours. It was truly a blessing. We made copies and everyone has one.

    Computers are such a pain!

  26. I’m excited to learn that you quilt and make jewelry in addition to using your creativity as a writer. I know all of these will be part of how you are remembered, along with the many ways you’ve touched people’s hearts.

    (Also, RIP hard drive. Hope that warranty came through for you!)

  27. Lovely post, it makes me reevaluate the importance of certain fleeting things and the significance of those intangibles that stay with the ones we love after we’re gone. I tend to be introverted as well, but I feel like I get the opportunity for more introspect which gives me a better grasp of who I am and what my motivations are. There is much I’d still like to accomplish, but I try not to have regrets because everything, even my missteps, have contributed to who I am and I’m mostly okay with that person. 😉

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