I have previously mentioned having gone through a long period of depression after being held up at gunpoint. During this time, I found that my best friend from high school was diagnosed with cancer. I often went to visit my friend when I went home to the mountains for a weekend. I struggled during this segment of my life.
On one such trip, I stopped at a shop on my way to her house. I am not quite sure what possessed me to stop other than the fact that I was curious about the name. They actually sold jewelry, crystals and stones, books, and meditation/music CD’s. This shop was run by a member of a local new age cult type place. I only know that they have a leader, devote themselves to his work and teachings, and they promote peace.
The merchandise was not really my kind of thing but, I was both intrigued and startled. The two women who worked there were ever so helpful in answering questions and offering reassurance. Before I knew what was happening one of them shoved a huge crystal into my hand. I instantly felt a sensation, a trembling throughout my entire body. It scared the crap out of me. I wanted to drop it, but it was seriously massive…I was registering the monetary cost of replacing it if I were to shatter it, so I clung to it. She looked me right in the eyes and asked what I felt. She said she knew I would feel it’s energy and assured me that it was perfectly normal. However, at the time I felt anything but normal. Anyway, after she replaced the crystal on it’s podium, I tried to shake it off by continuing to browse the store and focused on the jewelry.
I saw the most beautiful pendant I’d ever seen. I was drawn to it. It was a large oval stone in a silver setting. The stone was dark and light and brilliant all at once. (It had streaks of grey and almost greenish black with streaks of opaque light bursting through.) For some reason, I felt comforted. I remarked to the other girl that it appeared to be a forest with the sun peaking through the trees. It seemed to offer hope. She asked me if I was interested in purchasing it. I never questioned the price; it just looked too expensive, like it would have been out of my price range. I told her that I loved it but I was sure that it was something I could not afford. She pulled it out of the case, placed it in my hands, and gently and gingerly wrapped my fingers around it. She simply looked me in the eyes, smiled, and replied, “It is yours”.
I was flabbergasted. I wasn’t quite sure what to say. I refused it at first. She insisted that it was her gift to me, and that some day when I no longer needed it I could pass it on to someone else who did. It wasn’t until much later (years) that I actually got what she meant by when I no longer needed it.
When I returned to my home that week, I went to my local library and found that the stone was a feldspar and most likely belonged in the Labradorite family. That was all I knew about it at that time. I chose to wear it all the time. I loved it. I found both comfort and hope in wearing it. I thought the kindness and generosity of the giver was unmatched in anyone I’d ever met. I continued to be in contact with this person for a couple of years, even after she returned to Australia.
More recently, I did a bit more research on feldspar/labradorites. I found that it is considered a healing stone. It is one believed to provide relief from anxiety, hopelessness, and depression. It is said to promote harmony, clarity, understanding, confidence, and enthusiasm. People who use stones for healing use feldspar in times of conflict, confusion, and change. Was this why she gave it to me? Did she sense I needed it? In retrospect, I think maybe she did.
After learning what I now know about this, I have asked a few people their opinions on the subject. Some believe in the energy and healing power of stones. Most of my Christian friends do not believe it and think it to be evil. I asked a pastor friend who assured me that there is nothing evil about it, that it indeed is possible for rocks to hold energy. After all the earth is filled with energy and capable of earthquakes and volcanoes. He does not doubt for a second what I felt when I held the crystal. He told me that people generally call what they don’t understand evil but it doesn’t make it so. He explained that evil only comes from the intention for which the object is used. And that pendant was given in an act of benevolence.
Have I passed on my stone? Not yet. Maybe, I am being selfish in trying to hang onto such a lovely stone, one to which I’ve formed an attachment. Or maybe, I just haven’t found the person yet who needs it.