Cookie Thief

I can not believe the audacity of some people. I was at the grocery store, and I witnessed this woman pull a package of bakery cookies off of the display table, rip it open, take one for herself and give one to her daughter and put it back.

Hello there. You just stole those cookies. Not only that but you just taught your daughter that it’s alright. What the hell is wrong with you, you stupid jerk? And the person who picks up that package and purchases it will go home to find that it’s two cookies short. Dang, I’ll never buy bakery cookies again.

If she was really that hungry(she looked like she had had a few cookies before she got to the store!) and couldn‘t afford to buy one, she could’ve gotten the free cookie offered by the bakery for her child and split it. Heck, I’d have bought her child a cookie. Just don’t go stealing crap and acting like nothing is wrong with it.

I wanted to go pop her over the head. And I am not a violent person. She was like four times bigger than me, so I’m sure she’d have kicked my butt. However, I would’ve gone down screaming. Screaming for honesty. Screaming about wondering what the hell has happened to this world that people think they can just take whatever they want, whenever they want it, and without any consequences. They act like they think the world owes them everything!

When Oldest Son was about five or six, we were grocery shopping and he wanted some candy. It was the Brachs that are in open bins and you scoop what you want into a bag. Anyway, I told him that he couldn’t have any that day.

When we got home, he gave me a smirk and pulled two pieces of candy out of his pocket. I was livid. I told him that he was not going to eat it and that we were taking it back to the store and paying for it. I know you’re thinking it was just two little pieces of candy. Well, too bad. Two pieces…fifty pieces, stealing is stealing. I was not going to encourage the budding of a little thief.

First, I called the store manager and explained the situation. The manager said he appreciated my call, but really it was just a couple of pieces of candy, forget about it. I told him that it was the principle of the matter and that I was returning my child to the store and would like him to give him a talk about stealing that would scare him. You know the kind of talk that would make him think long and hard about EVER doing it again.

I escorted Oldest Son, piggy bank in tow, back to the store. We went to the manager’s office. The man was probably not over thirty and not experienced with kids. Oldest Son was shaking he was so nervous. I was feeling a bit guilty, but not nearly as guilty as I’d feel if I raised my child to think it was acceptable to steal. Manager Man explained about stealing and that people go to jail for stealing. Good job, what I was looking for. Then he said boys like you are bad and they go to jail if they keep it up when they get big. Boys like you. Not exactly what I was looking for but I asked for the lecture. I figured I’d remedy the fine points when I got home.

Manager Man was willing to let it go there. No, I told him he must also pay for the candy. He was like I don’t even know what to charge for two measly pieces of candy. Well put a price on it, I told him. He took Oldest Son to the register and charged ten cents. With trembling fingers, Oldest Son shoved the entire contents of his piggy bank, crumbled dollars and coins at Manager Man. He picked out a dime and handed the rest back to him. Oldest Son then handed the candy to him. Manager Man said you can have it, you just paid for it. Oldest Son said, no I don’t want it. He left it on the counter.

When we got home, I told Oldest Son that he was not a bad boy that he had just made a bad choice and we made it right. I continued the usual talk about never taking what does not belong to you and never taking things without paying for them.

Were my actions right or wrong? Was I too harsh? I don’t know. I had two very close friends at the time with children the same age. One said that I was ridiculous that she would never have put her kid through what I did to teach him right from wrong. She thought taking the candy away with a simple reprimand would have been sufficient. The second friend thought it was the right thing to do but admitted she never would have been able to go through with it. Oldest Son , now 23, remembers the incident and doesn’t appear to carry any horrible mental scars from it. I guess only time will tell.

Should I have drug Cookie-Stealing-Woman to the managers office and demand that she cough up the cookie or the dough? Actually, I didn’t say a word to her. And she was oblivious to my eyes-popping-out-of-my-head stare and my gaping mouth. (No, I was not drooling for her cookie!) It was a I-can’t-believe-you-just-did-that gaping mouth. So, in a loud voice I pointed her out and said what she’d just done to a lady standing beside me. The lady had seen it also and thought it was disgusting not only to do that but to hand down such despicable morals to your children. Cookie-Stealing-Woman was not fazed by us. However, I fumed the entire time I shopped and went home grumbling to anyone who would listen to me. And when there was nobody else to fret about it to, I told the dog. She completely understood my dismay.